Dealing with Fear Thoughts and the Critical Voice

This is a great video I just found where Benjamin Smythe talks about one way to approach the inner voice of “me” that thinks it’s in charge of everything.



0:33What would happen if you loved that voice?”

1:24  “And you even do this radical thing where you open your heart to it.”

2:29 “To hear the fear, and to hear the anger, and to hear the judgement, and to hear the criticism.  And to hear it coming all from the very same source, this really scared separate me…”

3:32 “It’s mad because we sacrifice for love and approval which never actually comes from others.”

4:33 “So have the courage it takes to love something that is just totally terrified.”

5:33 “This voice is developed by culture, it’s developed by lying to yourself.”

6:10 “And if you can love that rage and that anger, it will subside and that voice will become a comedian.”

6:40 “And at first it might be hard to laugh, but over time it’s like you have a best friend with you and all they do is make you laugh…Pretending to be in charge.”

7:55 (The voice) “is totally terrified because it believes it is separate from everything.”

8:50 “You can absolutely do it, it just requires opening your heart to the last person you could imagine opening your heart to.”


Me – Not our natural inclination, but oh so powerful!

Me – And we can apply this to all voices internal and external that try to get the reactionary self activated 🙂

Obtain Silence Through Curiosity

How does it happen?

Place-of-silenceTrying to obtain silence or awareness can be a tricky endeavor.

Anytime there is a “me” there trying to be aware or trying to be silent, awareness and silence will be veiled. Anytime there is any kind of agenda for the “me,”  the “me” is more than happy to jump into the conversation and offer it’s skilled advice or alternate solutions.

The key is to have the “me”  quiet down just enough so the actuality of silence is realized.

There are a zillion and one techniques teachers suggest to help us quiet the mind, and thus recognize the awareness that we are.

One tip you hear many teachers recommend is to “get curious” about what is happening when negative feelings or emotions arise.  They say by being curious, there is a subtle something happening that allows the feelings and sensations to just be as they are.  And when we are just being, the “me” is silent.

But when I tell myself to be curious, it somehow activates the mind too much.  Like I’m telling or commanding myself to ‘do’ something which then triggers “me” to respond or resist to the suggestion.

What seems to be helpful to me is when a feeling or a sensation appears, instead of telling myself to be curious,  I simply ask “how does this _________happen?

“How does this tiredness happen?”

“How does this sadness happen?”

“How does this anger happen?”

“How does this tingly feeling in my stomach happen?”

When I ask this way, I do not get verbal responses. When I ask this way I get silent feedback.  Then I am able to be more aware of what is happening instead of losing myself in mental dialogue.

This method also seems more of an ‘in-the-moment’ activity that has no secret agenda for the benefit of the “me.”

And when there is no agenda for the “me”, I do not find myself fifteen minutes later, lost in mental commentary 🙂

Benjamin Smythe – The Cause of Suffering

1:23  “A lot of suffering is mental narration.  We all deal with physical pain the best we can…mental narration is the rest of it.

‘How am I telling the story about whats going on here?’

And in some ways, not to over-simplify it,  but that just comes down to memory.

The one thing I can’t remember is THIS.”

Benjamin Smythe – How Do I Not Identify With Thoughts

1:11 “Don’t think too hard, just look for the thinker.”

’nuff said…

Looking Through an Interactive Camera Lens

POVSomething interesting.  When my attention is not focused on any specific ‘thing’, then a kind of shift in perspective happens.

Almost like a falling back impression. Sort of like watching an interactive virtual reality movie.  

‘I’ am stationary while the camera moves about the place.  Things appear on the video screen.  Objects and forms are perceived by the camera lens.  

Images appear.  Sounds are heard.

Other odd things arise on this weird interactive movie screen…like sensations and thoughts.

I don’t know what will show up.

And even a nice sense of peace is there in the background as well. Nothing dramatic, just a subtle relaxation.

I will report back upon further investigation of this curious phenomena 🙂

silence has found me

echoes from emptiness

This poem was originally posted on one of my other blogs in 2009. During some cyber housekeeping I found it again and it spoke to me with the same intensity expressed six years ago. It wants to be shared here on ‘the echoes’. With love.


Johann Heinrich Füssli - The Silence

silence has found me

its ruthless simplicity
has culled the clutter
from closets
I never knew existed
in the corridors of my brain

its unstoppable tide
has drowned the demon
that danced through my days,
demanding:
control, adjust, fix!

its throbbing roar
has muted the mutterings
of protest,
the pleas for reprieve,
from the screaming ‘me-me!’ myth

its yawning vastness
has swallowed whole
the impostor who once laid claim
to this luminous lifestream:
t i m e

its perfect love
has melted all that I took
to be me
in its crucible of fiery
Grace

and the receptors in these cells
heard the words
the…

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Rupert Spira – Don’t Do What The Feeling Is Asking You To Do

Rupert Spira – Exploring Uncomfortable Feelings

fear1I know that I have been running away from unwanted feelings my whole life.  “My” story is that some feelings are too intense to really allow, and that they may destroy me if I let them take me over.

I know that is a silly story but maybe I picked up that commentary when I was too young to look at things logically.

I don’t know how it happen or even care how, but I do know that suppressing or repressing unwanted feelings has never solved anything my whole life.  And actually suppressing and repressing has led to a zillion dysfunctional strategies to cope with these “overwhelming” sensations.

Now, awakening to non-duality, and even through basic common sense, there is a knowing at a deep level that these feelings will not destroy me.  Now it is high time to look the ‘boogey man’ straight in the face.

This video from Rupert Spira gives us two specific strategies for what to do when the “boogy man’ appears.

-Strategy 1-
4:57 “What the feeling is asking you do to is to avoid it, or suppress it. So don’t do either. Do the opposite. Turn around and face it.

Let the feeling come totally to you…face it so fully that you can keep facing it, keep living with the feeling.

Opening yourself to the feeling until you can truly say that there is not the slightest resistance to it.

And you have to be very careful because of course the separate self will turn even this into a technique for getting rid of the feeling. In other words (the separate self is) allowing the feeling so that I can get rid of it. That’s not allowing the feeling.

So you have to really take time and check with yourself that the feeling is being allowed without the slightest resistance to it.

And the test of that is (ask yourself), ‘can I live with this feeling forever?’ You have to be able to answer YES to that question.

When you can answer yes, honestly to that question you know that there is no resistance to it. Then turn around and look at the feeling again and see what remains of it.”

-Strategy 2-
6:42 “So that’s one approach. That approach goes directly to the feeling.

Another approach would be to explore the separate self around whom the feeling revolves.

Because the feeling is always a sensation in the body plus a line of thinking, and that line of thinking always has the separate self as the main character

Let’s say there is a feeling of sorrow. It will be felt here (chest), or it will be felt here (sternum). It will have a bodily component to it. But there will also be an accompanying commentary that revolves around a separate me character.

So the first thing to do in this case is explore that separate I. Go towards your self…Discover if that separate self is really present, is it really what you are (Go to I before form).

If you go to the feeling of I am, do you really feel a separate limited located awareness? Or do you find ever present unlimited being?

In this way you’re exploring the thought aspect of the feeling. The feeling has a bodily aspect and a thought aspect. You are exploring the thought aspect that revolves around the separate I.

Now having discovered that the separate I is non-existent, the whole story that was revolving around it, it can no longer stand.

Then you are just left with the sensation in the body. This wave of sensation that was part of the sad feeling.

The you explore the sensation…you just go to the raw sensation and you explore it.

And that exploration…although we don’t realize it when we are doing it, we are actually flushing out the me feeling from the body.

Seeing that the body is just transparent vibration permeated with empty knowing.


After writing this post I realized that running away from unwanted feelings is not a loving act towards myself/sensations. There is understanding that a feeling is just like anything else and that running away, or hiding from unwanted feelings is not a kind act.

Basically I have rejected unwanted feelings. How can love shine through when there are acts of rejection and separation from ‘unwanted’ sensations? Crazy.

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