Category Archives: non-duality

Looking Through an Interactive Camera Lens

POVSomething interesting.  When my attention is not focused on any specific ‘thing’, then a kind of shift in perspective happens.

Almost like a falling back impression. Sort of like watching an interactive virtual reality movie.  

‘I’ am stationary while the camera moves about the place.  Things appear on the video screen.  Objects and forms are perceived by the camera lens.  

Images appear.  Sounds are heard.

Other odd things arise on this weird interactive movie screen…like sensations and thoughts.

I don’t know what will show up.

And even a nice sense of peace is there in the background as well. Nothing dramatic, just a subtle relaxation.

I will report back upon further investigation of this curious phenomena 🙂

Rupert Spira – Don’t Do What The Feeling Is Asking You To Do

Rupert Spira – Exploring Uncomfortable Feelings

fear1I know that I have been running away from unwanted feelings my whole life.  “My” story is that some feelings are too intense to really allow, and that they may destroy me if I let them take me over.

I know that is a silly story but maybe I picked up that commentary when I was too young to look at things logically.

I don’t know how it happen or even care how, but I do know that suppressing or repressing unwanted feelings has never solved anything my whole life.  And actually suppressing and repressing has led to a zillion dysfunctional strategies to cope with these “overwhelming” sensations.

Now, awakening to non-duality, and even through basic common sense, there is a knowing at a deep level that these feelings will not destroy me.  Now it is high time to look the ‘boogey man’ straight in the face.

This video from Rupert Spira gives us two specific strategies for what to do when the “boogy man’ appears.

-Strategy 1-
4:57 “What the feeling is asking you do to is to avoid it, or suppress it. So don’t do either. Do the opposite. Turn around and face it.

Let the feeling come totally to you…face it so fully that you can keep facing it, keep living with the feeling.

Opening yourself to the feeling until you can truly say that there is not the slightest resistance to it.

And you have to be very careful because of course the separate self will turn even this into a technique for getting rid of the feeling. In other words (the separate self is) allowing the feeling so that I can get rid of it. That’s not allowing the feeling.

So you have to really take time and check with yourself that the feeling is being allowed without the slightest resistance to it.

And the test of that is (ask yourself), ‘can I live with this feeling forever?’ You have to be able to answer YES to that question.

When you can answer yes, honestly to that question you know that there is no resistance to it. Then turn around and look at the feeling again and see what remains of it.”

-Strategy 2-
6:42 “So that’s one approach. That approach goes directly to the feeling.

Another approach would be to explore the separate self around whom the feeling revolves.

Because the feeling is always a sensation in the body plus a line of thinking, and that line of thinking always has the separate self as the main character

Let’s say there is a feeling of sorrow. It will be felt here (chest), or it will be felt here (sternum). It will have a bodily component to it. But there will also be an accompanying commentary that revolves around a separate me character.

So the first thing to do in this case is explore that separate I. Go towards your self…Discover if that separate self is really present, is it really what you are (Go to I before form).

If you go to the feeling of I am, do you really feel a separate limited located awareness? Or do you find ever present unlimited being?

In this way you’re exploring the thought aspect of the feeling. The feeling has a bodily aspect and a thought aspect. You are exploring the thought aspect that revolves around the separate I.

Now having discovered that the separate I is non-existent, the whole story that was revolving around it, it can no longer stand.

Then you are just left with the sensation in the body. This wave of sensation that was part of the sad feeling.

The you explore the sensation…you just go to the raw sensation and you explore it.

And that exploration…although we don’t realize it when we are doing it, we are actually flushing out the me feeling from the body.

Seeing that the body is just transparent vibration permeated with empty knowing.

After writing this post I realized that running away from unwanted feelings is not a loving act towards myself/sensations. There is understanding that a feeling is just like anything else and that running away, or hiding from unwanted feelings is not a kind act.

Basically I have rejected unwanted feelings. How can love shine through when there are acts of rejection and separation from ‘unwanted’ sensations? Crazy.

Invite the ‘Me’ Thoughts to the Presence

Sunday Satsang with Magdi – Jan 25, 2015

Magdi– “All is well in Presence. Impersonal. Not trying to go anywhere. No issues to settle, problems to resolve. The gentle, tender, borderless Prescence that takes no effort. That has no one versus another. That has no me concerns, free-free.

So you can invite whatever arises to that presence to recognize the peace which is not the result of any thinking. Which is not arrived by via any strategy. Which is not something that the mind can grab and make it ‘mine.'”

Me-Anytime there is a “me” or a “my” in the thinking, it is not presence. And whenever there is a “me” or a “my” in the thinking there is a sense of being limited and that something needs to change to be fulfilled.

But that thing or event or condition that “me” or “my” thinks it needs to be fulfilled never is the answer. And the “me” and the “my” will just find something else to find wrong when it gets to this thing that it thought it needed to be fulfilled.

Then once again the “me/my” will reappear and then seek some other thing, or event or condition it feels it needs to have to be fulfilled.  The cycle never stops as long as there is a “me/my” on board.

▼▼This video by Rupert Spira goes on to further explain how seeking fulfillment in ‘things,’ ‘events,’ or ‘conditions’ is not the answer we are looking for▼▼

Rupert – “We’ve been seeking for happiness in objects, or situations, or relationships all our life.

And at some point it dawns on us that happiness is not revealed, is not experienced as a result of acquiring any kind of an object.

At some stage we see that clearly that what we have longed for so deeply all our lives is not going to be delivered by an object.

The love we have longed for all our lives is not going to be delivered by a relationship.

The peace that we longed for is not going to be delivered via a situation.

At some stage we see this very clearly. And as a result of this seeing, our investment in objects and relationships and situations diminishes, decreases.

That is not the same as saying that we cease relating with objects, people. Not at all. We continue to have all kinds of relationships to be involved more or less actively in the world. All these things continue.

But we no longer invest our happiness, our sense of love and peace in them.”

Fireside Chat with Magdi Badawy

On September 29th, 2014, I was lucky enough to be part of a small group having a personal conversation with Magdi Badawy.

The discussion that day focused on a few key aspects about the non-duality of awareness.  The satsang was profound, illiminating, very funny, and even logical all at the same time.  It had a huge impact on me in the moment, and the effects have not been lost.

Below is the video of that conversation.  As usual I will quote the parts of the dialogue that strike me the most, and I will also offer my personal  contemplations of the quoted snippet.

Non Duality: The zero distance of consciousness. Consciousness is everybody and everything

6:46 “Go to this I…You can’t pin it down.”

I think I try to ‘pin  down’ the I…I try to pin down the I and make it an object that “Me” can experience. But this I is not an object that “Me” can experience. The I can notice the “Me”, but the “Me” can’t notice the I.

The “Me” is not an experiencer, the “Me” is an experience.

30:18 “Whenever you are reverting or adopting the ‘I am’ this body-mind…your mind has adopted a very complex program of a zillion things.  And they’re all separate and I’m a separate thing among the zillions things, and I’ve got to maneuver my way through this maze.”

31:06 “As soon as you adopt the position of ‘I am a body-mind’, you’ve immediately downloaded a very complex program that we refer to as ‘separation.’  And this program has been downloaded into your body as well as the ‘me’ sensation.”


God often uses subtle clues to point us towards the the truth of ourselves.  The Infinite also has some ‘not-so-subtle’ methods to get us on the right path.

This post is about one of those ‘not-so-subtle’ pointers.

Long ago, after a couple of years of non stop “spiritual” seeking, studying, etc. I drove to a job appointment and it went really well. I told myself that it went well due to my seeking and achieving spiritual platitudes.

As I drove away down the road, I was all proud of myself and my personal achievement.

Ahead, the traffic light turned red, and I pulled behind the car in front of me. The cars bumper was so shiny it was like a mirror. And in that mirror I saw my car license plate reflected back at me.  This is what it read.



My car license plate, reflected backwards and in reverse order, read DIEMORE.  

The message was loud and clear. The message was, “Let go of feeling like you have any ‘personal’ achievement.  Let go of taking credit for anything.  Die more to anything you think ‘you’ achieve.  A higher power ‘does’ it all and the I, the person, can’t take credit for any of it.”

But this was still early in the journey and at that time I didn’t totally understand what it meant.  Flash forward about 10 years…

On thanksgiving 2014 I was driving to a friends house for a Holiday visit.  On the highway to his house, I saw another license plate that grabbed my attention.  This time the license plate was on a car I was passing to the right.

Here is an image of the car…

dodilee b

and a close-up of the license plate.

dodilee c


I dont know if I mentioned it, but my first name is Lee.  The license plate reads:


This time I understood exactly what the message meant.

Now, in all the non-dual activities I engage in be it watching videos, being in Satsong, conversations, personal ponderings, and plain daily life, I always make an effort to remember to allow the individual “me” to DIE as much as possible.

This past weekend during a non-dual gathering with Lisa Cairnes at One Circle, I actually mourned the loss of some of that individual…and at the end of the event there was a lightness and joy that I cant begin to describe 🙂

See this post for more about the incredible non-dual gathering with Lisa Cairnes.

Rupert Spira – Grace is a Pull from Happiness

This is a fantastic video that once and for all clears up the question of:

Can the individual ‘DO’ anything to facilitate the process of awakening?

The Practice That CAN Be Done

The Practice That CAN Be Done

Many of the non-duality speakers say that there is nothing the individual can do to help one reach the state of oneness. Many teachers say it is mainly a mystery how it happens and that the individual, because it doesn’t actually exist, really doesn’t do anything at all, let alone DO awakening.

But the experience for ‘me’ has been that some of what I seem to do, often does actually help me rise above the individual problems that we can entangle ourselves in.

The ‘practice’ I have done and have suggested to others in times of clarity is to just notice when your ego/pain body/mortal mind is running away with you.

Just notice the dysfunctional aspect of ourselves and watch how it may actually even like to get involved with drama and chaos.

Don’t even try to change anything and simply view the mechanisms of the dysfunctional ego.

My experience is that when I notice the ego play its destructive games, even for a split second, then I am not IN the drama any more. I separate out of the drama and am at least temporarily not hooked in the game of dysfunction.

I am actually pretty amazed how effective even a split second of recognition can help resolve the situation (It may actually not even be the ‘little me’ that does this technique, but it seems like it is).

Of course it is real easy to slip back into mind ego games and lose myself once again in the chaos, but it seems to get slightly easier each time I am aware enough to do this little exercise.

Again, many non-dual speakers do not advocate practice of any kind. But today while checking out YouTube, I stumbled across this video by Karen Richards which directly corroborates this little practice of mine.

After viewing this video I feel even more motivated to continue this “watching” any time I remember to do so.

About Practice / KAREN RICHARDS

2:45 “I think the only practice, if we want to be committed, is recognition of our true self”
3:21 ” So really, the only helpful practice as I see it, is to actually recognize yourself irrespective of what may be happening.  And that doesn’t mean that you have to segregate the experience.  ‘Right I’ve got to meditate or I’ve got to go into some kind of special state and actually recognize it.’  You can do it while you’re eating your lunch or while you’re brushing your teeth…Focus beyond the experience, beyond what is seen, to the seer.  A subtle switch in focus, which experientially seems to have a profound effect on peace in the human experience.”

And this video too, speaks about the ‘recognition’ of the mind games and how it is something that may helpful.

Trust Your Recognition / KAREN RICHARDS

AND, this one too 🙂

Primordial Awareness / KAREN RICHARDS

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